"i'm trying to play reverse psychology on the air conditioner" "Sometimes when your gone, I sneak into your food bin and eat your veggie straws.""I also broke your ruler that weekend when we were playing hallway baseball.""I am going to be a professional dolphin singer""Well gay rights just got approved in Missouri so....""I thought that was an animal, but its just a rock""There was a point when I would just sit and count the lights in the light bulb.""I could feed Africa with this amount of sauce.""I'm so mad. A child in Africa could be eating this sandwich, but it tastes like shit." Love,
Meredith Piper says a lot of funny shit during the day, but she gets even funnier after midnight. If she's near a lot of people right before bed, then it takes a long time for her to wind down. So I decided to start writing down all this crazy shit she says while we're both laying in our beds so that I can share with you the highly intelligent, serious conversations that we have at 2 in the morning. When it's night time I like to pop my foot.I need elbow pads so no one will hear me hit the wall.If you look over here...oh well you probably can't see... because you're not here.*starts singing national anthem*Who decided America was a "her" anyway?!I'm a butterfly, bitch.Questions for Jesus: Could you drown in your own saliva? Do lips absorb chapstick...questions for Jesus.Can dogs be deaf?FYI: Those last three were all said within a span of approximately 2.385 minutes.
<3 Ellie "Do You know whats in those?" |
AuthorsWe are just 4 roommates surviving college together. Our real names are classified, but our stories are not. We use fake names so we can share even more with you. Archives
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